I was surprised when I read his obituary. Recently, Dan, my brother-in-law, passed away unexpectedly. He’d been a very successful businessman. That’s what I thought would be highlighted.
Instead, I learned that “Creating a home for Tony, so that he could live his best life” was what he was most proud of.
It stopped me in my tracks. Apparently, a few years earlier, in a conversation with some friends, he’d casually said, “You know what I’m most proud of in my life?”
Then he shared that statement about Tony, his son who’d been born with a developmental disability. If something had happened to his parents, a group home would have been his only option.
By living there, Tony would be sharing his life with a revolving door of roommates placed by the county. Staffing and housing could also change overnight.
Plus, if Tony went to the group home, he could lose touch with the group of friends he’d grown up with.
The solution? Pursuing the newly introduced option of independent housing. Dan and my sister spoke with another family whose son has special needs. Tony had been his friend for years.
Together, the parents decided to buy and remodel a house for these two young adults, who were now in their 20s. It was a lot of work. They did it in their spare time—weekends and evenings. When done, they also contracted with county-approved staffing to be there at all times.
Today, Tony (who’s now in his 40s) is living his best life. He regularly gets together with his friends with special needs—both male and female. They get together for dinner. They go to the movies together.
Additionally, Tony is involved in Special Olympics, competing in bowling, poly-hockey (see photo), track, and bocce ball.
Tony also has a job. On Monday through Friday, he works in a high-end grocery store for a couple of hours each day. He’s very proud of his paychecks.
No wonder Dan was so proud of what he did. It wasn’t about what he achieved ... it was all about making a difference for another person.
I have to say, this got me thinking about what I’m most proud of. I’ll let you know soon.
Plus, I invite you to start thinking about what you’re most proud of too.
